The first Test vs Whitchurch

On a day when we took on our friends and rivals from Whitchurch and Oscar Middleton actually melted (he wore a sweater and it was 31 degrees centigrade) the skipper did the one thing required of him and won the toss. Of course we batted. A quite wonderful Sunday game followed with excellent debuts from John (Lootenant Dan) Munday and Garth (Darth) Taylor. Debuts not just for Cublington but in the game of cricket too. It was a triumph for cricket but a bad day of mathematics (not 'math', Prof, we are with you on this).

Kit G-S and Alec Howe took first dibs. Alec was brief, but at least did not run himself out this time. The skipper came and went as The Block failed to keep out a straight one. The Wazir failed, too. He felt turgid and we all know that you can't polish a turgid. Working class hero Benedict Tarquin Ramsbotham Fotherington Orchard ('no, I iz like properly working class innit') joined KGS and the bulk of our runs followed in a stand of 152. On rapturous applause (from himself) on reaching his ton Kit decided that what he really wanted was a red-inker and no grounds to buy a jug and retired. On count back from the scorer (Oscar Middleton - dad's profession: mathematics teacher) 100 turned out to be 83. Chairman Reilly, Simon 'n' Garthfunkel Taylor and the Prof sailed through briefly (the Prof walked for an LBW which is a new one for me) but their loss was the game's gain as Lootenant Dan strode into the Cublington Crucible for his first ever game of cricket. He dispatched the bowling to all parts and spanked 20 off about a dozen balls, including three fours. Never has the snake killing stroke been used to better effect. They'll need to find room in the MCC coaching manual for that one on the next edition. As the last wicket fell Kit '83 is the new 100' Gordon-Stuart came in to find those elusive 17 runs but Oscar decided that enough was enough and he fancied a cold drink so spooned up a catch and left for tea.

After a quite excellent tea (good work chaps) the Cubs took the field with the Howitzer and Pelican opening the bowling. Alas the Pelican had spent the morning playing in the annual church choir rounders match and had clearly left his bowling boots behind. Whitchurch were 50 for none off four overs and it was looking grim for the Cubs. Howitzer had Oborne senior caught, brilliantly by Chairman Maochael and Gadsby removed the highly grumpy Stokie. Oscar 'Heatstroke' Middleton stopped bowling full tosses long enough to bowl Baines (no relation to our version). Chairman Maochael, in a fine imitation of Jonty Rhodes took a screamer off our other debutant Garth Vader at backwood pointyhead. Darth finished with figures of six overs, one maiden, 26 for two on his first ever bowl in a match. Great work. Comrade Orchardovic got a wicket, Kit (formerly Gordon-Stuart) another and Lootenant Dan wrapped up with the last over defending 42 runs off the last six balls of the innings.

A cracking win by 30 runs, a great day out for both teams, Many thanks to Helen for the teas, and her melons, which was a nice touch. Also to the Waziri of Farzi for washing up, to Lisa for helping with everything and to Carol for drinks and moral support .